I want to pour my heart out to you because theres so much on my chest and mind that I cant sleep…but no matter how much i write, it doesnt all come through :c

#personal  

#personal  

Reborn today; Easter Baptism Testimony

Hi my name is Tiffany, and I want to share with you the second greatest story ever told. I grew up praying with my mom and dad every night before I went to sleep. My mom would read bible stories and watch veggie tales with me all the time. I read prayers from little kids praying books that said “Dear God, please help me love you with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my strength. In Jesus’ name, Amen. (from Deuteronomy 6:5)”. Every night I would pray these little prayers. Until one night my mom asked me if I believed that Jesus Christ was my Lord and Savior and died for all of my sins, and if I wanted to accept Him into my life. As I accepted Him into my life through a prayer, I felt all warm inside as a 6 year old girl. I spent most of my childhood here at CCMC, and I’m happy God has brought me back to serve here. Through the constant moving and switching of churches, I couldn’t grasp the whole concept of God very well. I didn’t have amazing fellowship or connections with other kids my age because I wasn’t constantly with the same people. Because I couldn’t find strong bonds with the people in church, I tried bringing my friends from school to church. Back then, they didn’t understand the idea of God and his sacrifice for our sins. I tried and tried to convince them that they were saved and that they should keep coming to church to know more about how awesome God was but they just refused. After trying to bring my friends to church, I started focusing more on reconnecting back with LWEC and reconnecting with God. Over the course of 7 years, my other church had this retreat they would always go to. I’d always wanted to go to see how the Holy Spirit would move me. So being as it is my senior year in high school, I decided to go since it was my last chance. The sermons and prayers were so powerful that everyone could feel God’s presence. Everyone was worshipping with their all and others were on their knees surrendering everything to Him. I was so moved. When the pastor was speaking he was speaking from the book of Nehemiah. He said that the things that matter to God need to matter most to you. He also said, “you can’t just subtracting out sins like ‘oh if I just get rid of the lying or the bad attitude, I’ll be holy again’, because you need to be able to crowd everything out and say yes to what God wants best for you”. Because Nehemiah said no to his friends, when they wanted him to go to a place where they would assassinate him, that choice saved his life. By placing God’s decision first in his life, he made God the cornerstone and foundation for his life. That night during the worship we received our own bricks as representations of how God needed to be the cornerstone in our lives. Whenever I see it in my room, 500 memories of Breakaway come back of how truly omnipotent God is. Even though I don’t have a very lost and distraught life, I’m making the decision now so that God will continue to guide my future plans and I would have God as my excuse to make the right decisions. Back then, I wasn’t quite sure how to bring my close friends to Christ, but now I will be able to add more experiences and stories of how God has changed my life to help bring others, including my friends, to see the beauty of knowing Christ as well.

why do i break so easily

If youre comfortable with a guy and trust them, why do they automatically think youve friendzoned them…

this is so annoying

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Time to Rant.

People always ask me “why do you like kpop!? Its not like you can understand it or anything”
I finally can justify myself and be confident in it.
Being a musician and singer for my whole life, i experience and appreciate music a little bit differently because of my understanding behind music. I dont need to know what the lyrics are saying to know exactly what the emotions and feelings are being evoked in the song. I appreciate kpop for its genuine sincerity in its music and art. Music nowadays consists of dropped basses and drugs, sex, and clubbing. (Not that i have anything against american music). But in kpop, i can hear each intricate effort to stress the higher parts or the true grief in the slides. Theres just something in the music that captivates me. Its always been like this is american music too. I’ll never pay attention to the lyrics but the actual beats, the harmony, the changing/transitioning sequences…
People might find it weird how i dissect emotions from music but its how i appreciate the art of music.

#personal  #kpop  #music  

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91,213 plays

“The inspiration of this song is The Little Mermaid  written in 1837. When the little mermaid turns 15, she falls in love with a prince. She asks the Sea Witch to give her legs in exchange for her voice. She hopes the prince would marry her and suffers a lot of pain for him but fails. The prince decides to marry the neighboring king’s daughter. Before dawn the little mermaid’s sisters bring her a knife from the Sea Witch. If she kills the prince with the knife and lets his blood drip onto her feet, she will become a mermaid again. But when she stands in front of his bed, she can not bring herself to do that. When the sun rises, she throws herself into the sea and her body dissolves into foam. In the song ‘Baby Don’t Cry’, the prince doesnt sleep, he wakes up and asks her to kill him:: ‘Dont hesitate, please take my heart. Love is kind of light winkling. It is mercy to close my eyes in the moonlight. Suppose me as a stranger, or fancy yourself actor. What we say is just lines of an opera. Baby dont cry tonight. When the dawn lights the skies, it will be as if nothing ever happened. You will never dissolve into foam, for my love is with you forever. So, baby dont cry cry.’”

(Source: dokyungsoo, via kimkaisus)

#personal  

read all or read none.

i dont wanna come off as a pessimist over valentines day but seriously.

seeing all these posts about love and what not.

what gives you the excuse to love for one day only?

if you have the love of your life already, do something special for each other and treat each other knowing that you guys appreciate each other EVERYDAY. dont make valentines day an excuse to do something special once.

if you dont have the love of your life and ask them on valentines day, whats they point of doing that? just because you want your anniversary to be on valentines day and u can buy one less gift? just because the label “valentines day” gives you more courage to ask a girl/guy? if you truly love that person, it doesnt matter what day it is because your feelings are true to you and only you. valentines day isnt an excuse.

and if you havent found the love of your life well…happy SAD!!

sorry im ranting…but my boyfriend and i don’t need a special day to say “hey i love you a little bit more today just cuz its valentines day” because i’ll always love him with all of my heart—every second, every minute, and every hour of EVERY day. 

not just valentines day. 

#rant  #personal  #valentines  

#personal  

Mom brought home a pack of balloons and a pump. Challenge accepted.

#wasting my life  

#personal  

“The wound heals but it never does
That’s cause you’re at war with love
You’re at war with love, yeah
These battle scars, don’t look like they’re fading
Don’t look like they’re ever going away
They ain’t never gonna change
These battle
Never let a wound ruin me
But I feel like ruin’s wooing me
Arrow holes that never close from cupid on a shooting spree
Feeling stupid cause I know it ain’t no you and me
But when you’re trying to beat the odds up
Been trying to keep your nods up and you know that you should know
And let her go but the fear of the unknown
Holding another lover strong sends you back into the zone
With no Tom Hanks to bring you home
A lover not a fighter on the frontline with a poem
Trying to write yourself a rifle
Maybe sharpen up a song
To fight the tanks and drones of you being alone
I wish I never looked, I wish I never touched
I wish that I could stop loving you so much
Cause I’m the only one that’s trying to keep us together
When all of the signs say that I should forget her
I wish you weren’t the best, the best I ever had
I wish that the good outweighed the bad
Cause it’ll never be over, until you tell me it’s over
Cause you’ve set me on fire
I’ve never felt so alive, yeah
Hoping wounds heal, but it never does
That’s because you’re at war with love
And I’m at the point of breaking
And it’s impossible to shake it”
– Battle Scars; Lupe Fiasco & Guy Sebastian

#life  #love  #hurt  

#personal